Friday, April 24, 2009
goodbye.
i bid my farewell.
it has been long overdue, seriously.
i had coaxed myself too many times that i had put you down, that i had let you go, that it no longer hurt anymore. i kept going back to where i started, thinking that i had moved on, and yet only to realize i didn't even budge at all.
you didn't need me in the first place but i refused to face it. i was still wishfully thinking away how you would need me one day. and i tried, so hard, to become someone whom you can depend on. i needed you to need me - even if it wasn't the way we used to be, i still hoped that i could be somebody you could turn to.
and now i am at the end of the road. but it isn't the dead end that brought me to tears tonight - it is about how empty my heart is right now. the worst thing in the world isn't about losing you - it is about having nothing after all that has been said and done.
and so here i am saying "this is goodbye, for good."
it has been long overdue, seriously.
i had coaxed myself too many times that i had put you down, that i had let you go, that it no longer hurt anymore. i kept going back to where i started, thinking that i had moved on, and yet only to realize i didn't even budge at all.
you didn't need me in the first place but i refused to face it. i was still wishfully thinking away how you would need me one day. and i tried, so hard, to become someone whom you can depend on. i needed you to need me - even if it wasn't the way we used to be, i still hoped that i could be somebody you could turn to.
and now i am at the end of the road. but it isn't the dead end that brought me to tears tonight - it is about how empty my heart is right now. the worst thing in the world isn't about losing you - it is about having nothing after all that has been said and done.
and so here i am saying "this is goodbye, for good."
10:51 PM, i wrote.
0 comments, you wrote.
0 comments, you wrote.
